Things I learned this week: Buffalo and Wild Boar are delicious, three desserts in one night are NOT too much, all martinis taste better with blue cheese stuffed olives, and I am too white trash to eat at five star restaurants. How did I learn these life changing tidbits? My Steve is home for Spring Break this week so we went out to a fancy dinner for my belated birthday since he wasn’t able to come home in February. We got dressed up and went to the Manhattan Steak & Seafood restaurant (it’s really more of a supper club) in Orange. Oh. My. God. Sometimes when I think about heaven it’s crystal chandeliers and leather upholstered booths. We of course made a great impression by changing our reservation time 3 times then arriving with our own bottle of wine. It was a good bottle of wine and there was no corkage fee but we still came in with it. We started with a split of champagne and an appetizer of scallops. The scallops arrived and it was two. Two scallops. They cost $9. I have to say though, they were worth every single penny. They were the best scallops I have ever had in my entire life. They were creamy and buttery and perfectly cooked. They practically melted in your mouth. Once we were finished with the appetizer we ordered our entrees and a drink each. Steve ordered the Wild Boar and a Manhattan while I ordered the Buffalo Filet and a 007 Martini. When the waiter asked how I wanted the filet cooked I said ‘medium well’ (as I always do) and the waiter said “the chef prefers to cook it medium rare. I suggest you try that.” Yeah it was that kind of place. (I hear Chef Francois’ voice in the back of my head: “In ordering something “special”, I only assume that a. you are profoundly ignorant and I pity you or b. you mock me…in which case I must fight you in a duel!”) The martini’s came out and the glasses were intricately carved crystal martini glasses whose stem had to be at least a foot tall and the glasses alone had to weigh 1lb each. And my martini had blue cheese stuffed olives in it. They were divine. SOOO good. When the entree arrived it was the most beautifully decorated plates I have ever seen. The buffalo was like an extra delicious filet mignon. It had a little game taste to it but was like butter. Smooth and flavorful. It was like eating the best steak you have ever had in your life and as a life long carnivore who LOVES steak that’s saying a lot. Even the mashed potatoes (which were served in little florets around the plate) were good and I HATE mashed potatoes. The meal was so good not only did I eat every bite but I, Beth, mixed my food. There was food everywhere and I did not care! Steve graciously let me try his herb encrusted wild boar. It was fantastic! The sage-y goodness was, as Steve described it, “like a pork chop on steroids”. And of course since it was my “birthday” we HAD to get dessert. Warm bread pudding and two glasses of port was ordered while I tried very hard to look sophisticated while licking my plate clean. You need to understand I am from the south and I LOVE bread pudding and this was AMAZING bread pudding that was devoured in approximately 3 seconds flat. Then the waiter came out and since it was my birthday they gave me a complimentary tiramisu with Happy Birthday written in chocolate and a little candle. So of course we ate that. We wouldn’t want to offend the chef…again. Then it was time for the check. Which came with two cinnamon sugar biscotti to soften the $200 blow but luckily the port had already done that. So we paid the bill, took our unopened bottle of wine, and walked merrily out convinced that we had fooled everyone into thinking we belonged there. Of course I’m pretty sure they just laughed at ‘those white trash people who ordered their steak medium well and wore clothes from Sears’.